Someone posted a comment to my last blog saying that he will do what he can to help, but anonymously, because people his wife works with don't know that he is a registrant. I certainly respect and understand the desire for anonymity, and there are lots of ways that anyone can help with this cause while remaining anonymous.
While I will honor anyone's request for anonymity (but still put you to work), I want you to think about some things. First, your anonymity as a registrant is just an illusion. My husband and I know from experience. When we were evicted from our home without cause, of course, we had to tell folks while we were suddenly moving from our home and neighborhood that we loved. Basically, what we came to understand was that, for years, we carried a burden in silence, deceiving ourselves into thinking that if we didn't talk about it, it either didn't exist or people wouldn't find out. What a self-deception that is! It's on the Internet and the masses are encouraged to visit their states' SOR at every turn. People can get aps for the Iphones and e-mail alerts about offenders wherever they are. The sole reason we came to this revelation was that when we began talking to our friends and family, most said they had known about this for years but chose to be our friends anyway. Close friends and neighbors protected us and supported us at times we never knew. Many revealed secrets of their own - of sexual indiscretions (many teenage) that could have landed them in the same position given the current long list of what counts as a sexual offense these days. One true friend remarked that people at our church had been praying for us since we walked through its doors in 1994 - pretty powerful and humbling stuff, regardless of what your religious beliefs are.
Second, we found that it was an absolute must for us to share his story rather than let a misleading website enable people to create one far worse than the real one. He was a lifetime registrant with a 15 year old victim. Was the offense yesterday? Last year? 20 years ago? What were the details of the offense? What has he done since to make restitution for the offense? The registry certainly does not answer those questions, and the scenarios that the general public can create are far worse than the real story. If you don't tell it, who will? We found when people understood the real story and how this has become a modern day witch hunt, many agree with us. But that doesn't happen if we don't tell.
Third, and most important, is that our collective silence is why all of us are here today. My husband and I spent years in compliance and fear dealing with something we knew deep down was just plain wrong. While we exerted a futile effort to stay anonymous and just live our lives, we allowed states to run rampant with "tough on sex offender legislation." We allowed entertainers like Oprah, Dr. Phil, and John Walsh to become subject area experts while real, solid research (that refutes most of the basis for the registry and its effectiveness) by highly qualified experts and our own federal government is completely ignored.
I take full responsibility for the current state of affairs because of my silence. I will no longer be silent. I no longer accept the status quo - Never in my wildest dream would I have ever considered myself an activist, but I willingly accept that fate now. The witch hunt is wrong; research does not support it, and I can do something about it. I will speak - I will tell the story. Will you join me?
Friday, August 13, 2010
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Get Involved!
Yesterday, Kentucky CFR launched our first bulk mailing to almost 3,000 registrants and their families. If you are at this site, you more than likely received my letter. To put your mind at ease and take care of your curiosity, let me tell you more about myself.
My husband is a former registrant in the state of Kentucky. Up until a few months ago, he was registered here for an offense that occurred over 25 years ago in the state of Arizona when we has 18 years old. His teenage offense is explicitly labeled non-dangerous in the record and was consensual. He has had no other convictions in that same quarter century, and completed a bachelor's degree, pursued a successful career in sales, and now runs a small business with several employees. We have two beautiful children and he is a terrific father and husband. He was a lifetime registrant, implying that he somehow presents a clear danger to the public, which is simply untrue. For years, we silently complied with the requirements of the registry, until we were forced to move from our home we owned and lived in for over 10 years due to the unconstitutional, retroactive application of the residency restrictions. Although my husband has since been removed from the Kentucky registry for having been deemed to have met the KY requirements, I continually worry about the lasting impact on our children and potential harassment and bullying they may face because of truly misleading information from the registry and other sources. It is ironic that I worry most about my children being harmed and victimized by a system designed to protect them. In reality, my children and I already are collateral victims of that system - that home was ours too.
So rather than sit in silence and wish that things were different, we have decided to speak out about the insanity that has gripped our state and nation in regard to sexual offenses. Please don't misunderstand. I believe that sexual offenses should be dealt with to the degree of the severity of the crime. I also believe that children should be protected. But the registry and the resulting hysteria do nothing to protect children. The widening range of sexual (and some non-sexual, like kidnapping) offenses that require registration is trapping young and old alike into a web of complex restrictions and post-conviction sanctions that leave many with very few options for employment or housing, the primary things that make their lives more stable and all of us more safe.
So I hope that you will join us in this fight. All our children deserve better.
Jennifer
Kentuckycfr@yahoo.com
My husband is a former registrant in the state of Kentucky. Up until a few months ago, he was registered here for an offense that occurred over 25 years ago in the state of Arizona when we has 18 years old. His teenage offense is explicitly labeled non-dangerous in the record and was consensual. He has had no other convictions in that same quarter century, and completed a bachelor's degree, pursued a successful career in sales, and now runs a small business with several employees. We have two beautiful children and he is a terrific father and husband. He was a lifetime registrant, implying that he somehow presents a clear danger to the public, which is simply untrue. For years, we silently complied with the requirements of the registry, until we were forced to move from our home we owned and lived in for over 10 years due to the unconstitutional, retroactive application of the residency restrictions. Although my husband has since been removed from the Kentucky registry for having been deemed to have met the KY requirements, I continually worry about the lasting impact on our children and potential harassment and bullying they may face because of truly misleading information from the registry and other sources. It is ironic that I worry most about my children being harmed and victimized by a system designed to protect them. In reality, my children and I already are collateral victims of that system - that home was ours too.
So rather than sit in silence and wish that things were different, we have decided to speak out about the insanity that has gripped our state and nation in regard to sexual offenses. Please don't misunderstand. I believe that sexual offenses should be dealt with to the degree of the severity of the crime. I also believe that children should be protected. But the registry and the resulting hysteria do nothing to protect children. The widening range of sexual (and some non-sexual, like kidnapping) offenses that require registration is trapping young and old alike into a web of complex restrictions and post-conviction sanctions that leave many with very few options for employment or housing, the primary things that make their lives more stable and all of us more safe.
So I hope that you will join us in this fight. All our children deserve better.
Jennifer
Kentuckycfr@yahoo.com
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Welcome to Kentucky Citizens for Reform
Our goals:
1. To educate the public and law makers of the constitutional, human rights, and criminal crisis surrounding the current sex offender law hysteria
2. To Education the public and law makers on evidence refuting the basis for current sex offender legislation (i.e.current research on recidivism rates, stranger danger, residency restrictions, civil commitment, ineffectiveness of registries in preventing child sexual abuse, and other sex offender issues.)
3. To create awareness of the impact of sex offender laws on the families of offenders and victims
4. To form partnerships with other concerned citizens, children's advocacy groups, and other interested parties to develop real solutions to sexual abuse
5. To reform current ineffective sex offender laws, including the abolition of the public sex offender registry
Our goals:
1. To educate the public and law makers of the constitutional, human rights, and criminal crisis surrounding the current sex offender law hysteria
2. To Education the public and law makers on evidence refuting the basis for current sex offender legislation (i.e.current research on recidivism rates, stranger danger, residency restrictions, civil commitment, ineffectiveness of registries in preventing child sexual abuse, and other sex offender issues.)
3. To create awareness of the impact of sex offender laws on the families of offenders and victims
4. To form partnerships with other concerned citizens, children's advocacy groups, and other interested parties to develop real solutions to sexual abuse
5. To reform current ineffective sex offender laws, including the abolition of the public sex offender registry
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